Feeling The Distance - Part Two

Now that I've let it all out, it's time for me to hop off my little whaaaaambulance.  

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I need to get a grip, right now.  This IS a happy time!  And I need to own it--after all, a happy time isn't necessarily an easy time, right?

So from now on when I'm feeling down or guilty or whatever about planning this wedding while the Bear is deployed I need, no I VOW, to keep the following in mind: 

• It's more than okay to focus on our wedding and every little fluffy detail!  Because it's for us--not just for me!  In fact, he wanted a traditional wedding more than I did.  So why not think of it as the world's best welcome-home-now-let's-get-our-life-started party?  I have a tendency to feel guilty about things that border on extravagant or expensive, but this isn't something to feel guilty about.  Guilt be damned--I'm gonna let myself get excited!

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• Speak up!  I have to take responsibility on this one.  I have great friends and family, and I've underestimated them terribly.  They want to be there for me as much as possible, but they can't know something is wrong unless I tell them.  And only after I speak up can they smack me back into reality.  So, from here on out, I'm going to be honest with the people that are closest to me and look to them for the support I need.

• It IS fun to talk about the wedding!  Even though we're worlds apart, this is an exciting time for both of us.  And this may sound odd for most guys (so I hear), but he actually enjoys listening to me blab about our wedding plans.  It's a distraction from the day, and it's our light at the end of the tunnel.  So while he may not actually care about our table runners or votive candles, he enjoys hearing about it because I care about it.  Amazing, right? (Why yes he is.)

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I have to keep a positive outlook, starting yesterday now.  It's alright to get upset from time to time, because let's face it: the situation sucks.  But I can't change it and I can't control it.  So I have to choose to keep my thoughts on the sunny side.  And I'll admit, it's not the easiest choice at all times (especially since I happen to be living through the "snowiest" January on record, GAH), but it's the right one.  




So how about you?  Is there anything in the planning process that you've had to just accept? Any more words of advice?