Tuesday, January 11, 2011

J. Cray Cray

I started having doubts about my choice of bridesmaids dresses right after I decided that they should all choose their own.  A couple of my bridesmaids told me that they felt that choosing their own dress in a specific color would be too hard.  And most of them told me that they were going to purchase their dresses at J.Crew, since that's where I saw the colors in the first place. 

Four of the bridesmaids will be in "Spiced Wine."

And the other three bridesmaids (my sisters and Cuz) will be in their choice of "Pale Lilac" or "Warm Pebble."

So after giving it some thought, I wrote them all a final email about their dresses.  Yes, they could still choose whatever dress they wanted as long as it was in the color I asked them to wear.  But, I asked that they please purchase the dress from J.Crew. Feeling strangely triumphant, I patted myself on the back.  This was a happy medium, a win-win situation!  They get to wear whatever they want, paying whatever they could afford, they'll all look different, and we're all happy!

The happiness continued the next day when I learned that all three of my "pink ladies" bought their dresses together!  

My excitement stretched into last night, when I asked my older sister to tell me which dress she chose, so I could get a better idea of how everything would look.  But my excitement became confusion when she hesitated to answer.  So I pressed on, and asked her again "which dress did you pick?"  And her response was "the dress you told us to get."  Red flags started going up, half raised, but up nonetheless.  Confused, I asked "what is the name of the dress you bought?"  She said she didn't know, but it was strapless and "the one I [Mich] want."  After some more prodding, I came to find out that she bought this dress:

Oh nice! And Lil $is?  What about her?

Mmmk...and Cuz?  I know she wanted chiffon dress but which one did she buy?

Oh.  So much for everyone wearing a different dress.

I guess the disappointment was obvious, because my sister followed up with "they were $60! And I already bought them, and they can't be returned."

This is still a little fresh, so forgive me if I start to sound like a brat but yeah, I'm a little upset about this.  I asked them to get different dresses and they didn't.  And as a bargain hunter  myself, I can appreciate that they scored these dresses for a MAJOR deal--but was that a good enough reason to not do what I asked?  If they purchased the dresses on their own and by coincidence, they all bought the same dress this wouldn't bother me at all.  I would laugh about it!  But the reason they bought the same dresses was because it was the cheapest one and that really bothers me.  There were dresses in that color for $80 and for $100 as well.  And I could have helped pay the difference, but I wasn't given the chance.   

Is this going to ruin the wedding?  Of course not. They will look beautiful and they will be comfortable, which is what I wanted. I just feel a little hurt right now.  

AAAND...crazy bride moment over.  I'm kissing it to the wind.  

How about you?  Did you have any surprising bridesmaid dress drama?


  1. Oh no :( I'm sorry you're bummed about this!

    Just an idea: what if you spice up one of the dresses a bit, to make it look different from the other one? Maybe add a sash or a flower or straps or something?

  2. I went back and forth about the bridesmaid dresses for soooo long... so much so that a few days before the wedding, my sister asked me if I would have changed anything and the one answer I could give her was I would have picked different dresses for them. But the day of it didn't even occur to me and now looking at photos- I love their dresses. The color photographed exactly how I wanted it to and everyone looked/felt beautiful. And while I might have been stressing about it for months and months, *they* didn't have a care in the world. They got the dresses they liked and they were happy. In the end, happy friends was more important than the one or two photos of us all lined up looking bloggy chic like I envisioned.

    I guess my point is that I completely understand the disappointment (I tried to ask them to pick different dresses too) but I hope you are able to keep "kissing it to the wind"

  3. @ Steph C & Sara -- thanks for the support! Its really easy to let little things get to you when you're planning a wedding, but I have a follow up coming soon (and I swear there's a happy ending!).